Introducing Daughter No 1

I am probably a terrible Mother. I have small children and most of the time I find myself laughing at them. No not teaching them to count in Spanish or how to make a dolls house out of paper mache like I am sure good mothers do. I am waiting for them to do the next funny thing so I can write it down and amuse my friends and family with their latest exploits.

Daughter number one is usually the one providing the laughs (mainly due to the fact that daughter number two is six months old and doesn't really do much at all). She is nearly three, a flaming ginger and seems to think that she rules the roost. She finds farts funny (particularly if they are her own!), calls her nipples her "ladybirds" and likes to pretend to be a princess by making her uncle carry her around in her child size wicker chair.
If she is feeling hungry she makes anyone in the near vicinity do "the biscuit dance" - This involves all those concerned standing in a circle holding hands, jumping up and down and singing "biscuit dance biscuit dance" until she decides we can stop.
She is also a bit of a childrens film buff. She has seen Tangled so many times she can quote whole sections to an unsuspecting audience at will. Her favourite line is to shout "You are never leaving this tower ever, ever, EVER. Great now I'm the bad guy." (For anyone who has actually seen the film there is only one ever in the line. She likes to throw in another couple for dramatic effect!)

Why demean yourselves by doing these things I hear you ask.

The answer is that it is infectious. We have yet to find an adult that comes to visit us who is not dragged into the ginger festivities in one way or another.

A perfect example is a family friend who is one of the most sensible ones we have. She was spending the afternoon with us when Daughter no 1 casually approached, tapped her on the knee and asked:

"Lottie, Do you know the Muffin Man?"

To which Lottie asked in a confused fashion: "The Muffin Man?"

To which D1 replied "THE MUFFIN MAN" then left the room without another word.

Any parent who has been forced to sit through Shrek a thousand times will understand!